For some time now, people have been telling me I look like Alan Davies. I can actually see the resemblance too. Sometimes I catch an Abbey National advert and have to concentrate on remembering that it's someone else on the screen. My grandmother even has a picture of him cut out of the Radio Times in a little paper frame, mascarading as me, so amazed was she by the similarity between us.

One morning earlier this year on the Northern Line into town I was momentarily stunned when someone got on at Kennington who is also a dead ringer for the star of Jonathan Creek. Taller, slightly greyer hair, his face thinner and longer than my own, closer to the real thing, and the hair more tightly curled in Alan's trademark 'it's not a perm' style. As we travelled through the silent tunnels of the morning rush hour I felt overcome by an irresistable urge to lean over to him and quietly whisper, 'Hi, I'm James. I look like Alan Davies too.' Luckily I managed to get a grip, and just carried on pretending to read my book while sneaking looks at him, hoping he wouldn't notice. Then it suddenly struck me that if he looks like Alan Davies and I look like Alan Davies, it follows that he must look like me. And indeed that I must look like him. I looked at his angular, drawn face. I couldn't see much of myself in him, to be honest, and in the end decided that we're opposite ends of the Davies lookalike spectrum. Put us either side of Alan and you've got three believable brothers. Take him away, and you've just got two blokes on the tube.

It's a bit weird, looking like someone else, knowing your doppelganger is out there – particularly when you're both trying to achieve something in the world of comedy – and sometimes I wonder if this will be a problem in defining myself as a individual media personality. Generally, though, I just find it very entertaining, particularly as the number of people I apparently resemble seems to grow with each passing day. So, here, for your delectation is a list of celebrities I look like (in order of actual realistic similarity):

1. Alan Davies
2. Diarmuid Gavin from BBC's Home Front
3. A young Eddie Izzard
4. Joe, the singer from Toploader [it's just the hair]
5. Jamie Oliver [noticed by a woman buying a paper next to me at the tube one morning]
6. Richard Herring [I'll refrain from commenting on this one]
7. Brahms [a proper famous person, and by far my most entertaining comparison, particularly as I really don't look anything like him at all]

You can see what I actually look like in the Bachman section of this site, or take a peek at an old Travelcard photo on Graybo's Passport Photo Rogue's Gallery.

So, do you think I look like anyone else? (Apart from a fifty-fifty combination of my parents.) §

I have begun to read All Hail The New Puritans, the short story collection by a bunch of young British authors lead by Nicholas Blincoe and Matt Thorne who have set themselves up as the literary equivalent of Dogme 95, writing a ten-point manifesto pledging simplicity and reality in their writing, but instead seem rather to be jumping on the tail end of a much more successful film bandwagon in an attempt to get greater exposure for their work. Granted, the New Puritans movement contains a great number of excellent writers whose work I very much enjoy, such as Toby Litt, Bo Fowler, Matthew Branton, Alex Garland, along with Matt Thorne himself, but this book amounts to little more than a bog standard collection of short stories, made no more or less interesting by the rules under which they have apparently been written. Not that the stories aren't good, because many of them are, but the manifesto seems like unnecessary icing on an already perfectly tasty cake.

I thought I should bring your attention to them though, seeing as their book directly inspired the recent re-design of this weblog – which, I must add, has been generously praised by numerous kind souls such as Reid, Rik and Nico. Perhaps I should draw up a manifesto for The New Web Puritans:

1. All text shall be black or grey on a white background.
2. Other than black, white, or shades inbetween, there shall be no more than one colour used on any web page.
3. There is only one font, and it is Verdana.
4. CSS layout good. Tabular layout bad.

And so on, into tedium. §

A leisurely afternoon spent wandering around Oxford Street. Picked up a few gems: two re-released Galaxie 500 albums in the Borders 3 for £18 CD sale, which I've been looking for for some time now; and a Kranky Records compilation, cleverly entitled 'Kompilation' for only £4.99 which I'm listening to at the moment. Kranky distribute, most famously, Godspeed You Black Emperor!, Labradford and Low and this compilation comes highly recommended by me if you're at all interested in the mysterious world of Post-Rock. Almost every single song on it intrigues me, and may spur me on to check out the artists' wider material, Low and Stars of the Lid (whose work I happened upon this afternoon in HMV while vainly searching for A Silver Mt. Zion label-mates Sofa with only the knowledge that their name began with an 'S'...) in particular. I've listened to Low's latest album 'Things We Lost In The Fire' before and didn't really go for it, but the track on the compilation is taken from a much earlier album so I've got an idea of where to start. §

My latest Amazon delivery finally arrived this morning, almost a week after it was apparently dispatched to me by First Class Royal Mail, although I must say that I'm very glad it arrived on a Saturday when I was at home. My previous experience of deliveries from Amazon is stepping through the front door after a day's work onto a little piece of card that reads, 'We tried to deliver a package to you, but you were out. Please collect it from your local sorting office. Opening hours: 8.30am to 8.32am.' Sometimes inefficiency can be a blessing.

However, perhaps as recompense for their incompetence, Amazon seem to have provided me with some sort of concilliatory bonus: seven books and two CDs ordered by a certain Miss Julie Whitney of Sandbach, Cheshire, who will, I'm sure, be thoroughly disappointed that her expensive order has ended up at my house. Oh dear.

Good stuff in my box, though; mainly a bunch of CDs by various North American post-rock bands spurred on by my recent acquisition of Godspeed You Black Emperor!'s 'Lift Yr Skinny Fists...' album, and a couple of books including The Elegant Universe by Brian Greene that Jason Kottke (amongst others) has been raving on about. Listened to my recently purchased audio entertainment, and my experimentation seems to have paid off. GYBE's first album 'F# A# oo' is indeed 'a sad and beautiful soundtrack to urban decay', although their best work seems to be the 'Slow Riot for New Zero Kanada' e.p: thirty minutes of tragic, mesmeric, elegiac, swirling rock. A Silver Mt. Zion and Fly Pan Am, both spin-offs from GYBE, are more spikey and stripped down but still excellent, particularly A Silver Mt. Zion's album 'He Has Left Us Alone But Shafts of Light Sometimes Grace The Corner of Our Rooms' is gloriously simple, washing over you in a great wave of sparse resonating sound. Don't they have great album titles? The song titles are wonderful too: 'Lonely as the sound of lying on the ground of an airplane going down (i) sit in the middle of three galloping dogs' (A Silver Mt. Zion); 'She dreamt she was a bulldozer, she dreamt she was alone in an empty field ' (GYBE). And the CDs all come in these beautifully designed little embossed cardboard sleeves. Definitely a bit of a find. [More about all these bands at the GYBE site.]

I also decided to give Virginian minimalists Labradford a go, having heard some of their music used on Chris Morris' Blue Jam and Jam. 'Mi Media Naranja' contains the track 'P' that appears on the Blue Jam CD so that seemed as good a place to start as any. Not sure about them yet. I think I might have to digest it a little more. §

Just redesigned the front page of Infinite Monkeys. Very Powazek circa early 2000, and all done with CSS again. Not a table in sight. Took me rather a while to get my head round absolute and relative positioning, but I worked it out eventually. And I've discovered another advantage of using CSS for layout: I can hide my AddFreeStats site statistics button in an invisible layer. Marvellous. No more blinking GIFs. Thank God. One problem, though: Using '{ margin: auto }' on a layer only centres it horizontally on the page, but not vertically. I had to fudge it by using a margin based on a percentage of page size. Does anyone have a solution? §

The pilot of Slap Bang with Ant and Dec has just finished, and it's gone brilliantly. Performed as live in front of a studio audience, almost everything worked, which is fantastic. Two total professionals - great comic performers, and thoroughly welcoming hosts - surrounded by a coterie of celebrity guests, providing one solid hour of quality entertainment. And it's funny. Really very funny indeed. If the viewers go for it on May 12th, which I think they will, Ant and Dec could be the first people to succeed in the notoriously impossible Saturday tea-time slot since Morecambe and Wise. As one of the other writers said, 'it's 100% bomb-proof'. I think I'd have to agree. §

Since suggesting that, after my Grandaddy gig in February, gig-going would become a regular occurrence, I finally make it to another one: Lowgold at the Mean Fiddler [terribly designed Flash-heavy website]. Support from Billy Mahonie who went 'chugga-chugga-chugga' a lot, and singer-songwriter Matthew Jay [excellently designed Flash-heavy website] who really grew on me by the end of his set, despite my being perched in the gallery bar and only hearing his music through a set of poor-quality speakers. And his lead guitarist demonstrated a unique facility to play his guitar with a drumstick that produced the most excellent whining sounds.

Lowgold made it on to stage at about half nine, and showed an admirable ability to cope with the screaming feedback produced by their weird staging which stands the singer's microphone on the left, right next to a massive speaker. They benefited greatly from headlining, rather than being in support as they were last time I saw them, and also from the fact that they'd since released an album and three singles which I had actually heard. A good set, but I felt they never really took off, never threw enough energy into their performance; partly the fault of their music which straddles the nebulous middle-ground between sweepingly melodic and harder West Coast rock. I also realised that I can no longer enjoy being part of the 'mosh pit'. Too many tall people blocking my view. I'd much rather be on the balcony having a drink and sitting down. I must be getting old.

The new Mean Fiddler (previously the London Astoria 2) is an excellent venue, incidentally - it's right next to Tottenham Court Road tube and is therefore probably the most convenient indie venue in London. And it only cost a tenner for three bands, which must be value for money. I shall go there more often. Which is sort of what I said last time. §

Food-based versions of Simon and Garfunkel lyrics:
'Like a fridge full of bottled water...'
'Oh veal, yeah, you're breaking my fast...'
'I'd rather have a cheeseboard than a pud, yes I would, if I could...'
'A pound of dry mince...'
'I am a stock, I am a Bo-vril...'
'They've all gone to cook for Amer-i-ca...'
[This is funny if you're sitting in a production office waiting for Ant and Dec to finish their dress rehearsal. Honest.] §

Poke the bunny! Ha ha! Yes! Ha ha ha! Poke the bunny! Poke him! Ha ha! Poke the bunny! Hahahahahahaha! Poke, poke, poke, poke, poke! Ha haha ha ha haha! Pokety-pokety-poke! Ha ha! Poke the bunny! [I have been poking the bunny. This is not a euphemism.] §

For all the link deprived children of the world, I give you:
Reminisce, Leave and Consume.
All neatly listed down below. [With apologies.] §

[PERSONAL MESSAGE OF BARELY ANY INTEREST TO ANYONE ELSE APART FROM THOSE LISTED: Matt, Richard and Mark Jackson, here is the design I've done for the advert for Garth Marenghi's Netherhead to be used in the Fringe programme. Don't know why the TIFF I sent you seemed so dark, but this JPEG should give you a proper idea of what it looks like. NORMAL SERVICE RESUMED] §

Four people in the audience last night, two friends and two strangers (that's Mark standing at the back), and yet it was probably the best show we've done since the first one. Weird how things work out. The rewrite we did over the weekend really has improved the show immeasurably. It just flows so much more naturally now, which is something we felt it was previously lacking. So we're happy.

Actually, now that I've started taking pictures of the audience with my lovely new FujiFilm MX-2900 Zoom digital camera, I'm considering setting up a site called Meet The Audience where people can go and see themselves immortalised in the unflattering glare of the flash. Another design project/work avoidance tactic to fill up my already busy working life, perhaps. Incidentally, talking of new projects, I've decided it was about time Mark and I had our own website, Bachman and Evans. It's not all there yet, but I thought I'd spread it around in its early stages. Oh, and it's all done with CSS, no tables - just like this. §

All hail the new simplicity! Give me black (or grey) text on a white background or give me death! Thou shalt not suffer a sidebar (with some exceptions)! Even kottke's simplistic design is looking a bit complicated these days. And somebody, please, stop me redesigning this place every month. It's a complete waste of my incredibly valuable time. §

My mother corrects me: she bred Welsh Ponies (Section Bs), not Welsh Mountain Ponies (Section As) which are apparently smaller. The Welsh Pony and Cob Society makes it all much clearer. §

'It's a small world. But I wouldn't want to have to paint it' - Steven Wright

Two incidents. Richard at rebuke.org heard my name in the credits for The Very World of Milton Jones on Radio 4 last night. And today I received an email from someone who had happened across my site completely by accident and their mother has lived in the same road as me for the last fifty years.

Are these surprising coincidences or are they not? I'm not sure. The first one probably isn't, given that I work in the entertainment industry which has an audience of pretty much everyone, though it's fun to be spotted, particularly in such a lowly role as one of a long list of writers. The second, moreso perhaps, but even then putting yourself on the internet potentially exposes you to everyone in the world with a computer and a phone connection. The chances of one of those people having a connection to something in your life is pretty high really.

So. Coincidence: yes. Surprising: not particularly. It's a big world, but media makes it miniscule. §

After Matt and Richard come round to discuss it, version 1 of the Garth Marenghi poster becomes version 2. I'm not sure I like it as much, though I can see the reasons behind Matt and Richard's decisions. It has to progress from last year, and still not be cheesy, which I hope I've achieved for them. They seemed happy and they're paying me, so that's good.

Interesting to compare it to last year's... §

Feeling slightly better today, though still a little wiped out by my brief illness. I'm left with a hacking cough and a resultant uncomfortable tenderness in my ribs which is most annoying.

Spent the whole of Easter Monday feebly wrapped in a duvet watching Some Like It Hot and the rest of our country's great contribution to bank holiday television. Cancelled the show that night, as ill people notoriously get worse in the evening and the last thing I wanted to do was to stumble about on stage, coughing and looking pale, drugged up on Paracetamol, aimlessly forgetting my lines. Mark and I rang the five friends we knew to be coming, and Mark made his way to the theatre at about 6.30 to catch anyone else we weren't expecting. No one else turned up. Lucky we didn't do the show to only five people then. Probably should never have done a show on Easter Monday anyway; everyone's too busy enjoying their long weekend to think about coming to see two people they've never heard of in a small pub theatre in Camden.

Someone once told me that there is a rule about stories that they can only contain one and a half coincidences before people stop suspending their disbelief. In that case the intersection of my life with that of my cousin Eddie is entirely ridiculous. Eddie is a film editor, and almost every project he seems to work on seems to totally randomly include somebody I know. For example: late last year, I went down to the set of a low-budget film called Club Le Monde that my friend Wendy was appearing in, and that afternoon I met Eddie who mentioned that he happened to be editing it. Then, Gina Yashere who worked on The Richard Blackwood Show once turned up to work with a script for a film called Mr In-Between that she was auditioning for. Today I visit Eddie in an editing suite, and he is editing it. Not only that but when I watch the credits at the end, the set dresser is a girl called Corina Burroughs who my sister and I used to know when we were young because her grandmother breeds Welsh Mountain Ponies like my mother did. This nonsense must stop at once!

Incidentally, Eddie showed me Mr In-Between this afternoon and it's pretty good, though unremittingly bleak, grim and violent. No idea how true to Neil Cross's book it is, but I quite enjoyed it. At the moment the producers and director are at odds about which of two possible endings to go for. Currently the producers have the upper hand, but having watched both, if they don't use the director's (Paul Sarossy, Atom Egoyan's director of photography) version they're making a very big mistake. Bleak is better. §

Grrr!
'Flu.
Grrr!
Ick. §

Busy. Busy. Busy.
Designing a new poster for Matt's Edinburgh show this year: Garth Marenghi's Netherhead. Going home for Easter. Rewriting Work in Progress significantly on Monday to perform the new version that night. Working on two outlines for episodes of Popeman. Stressing about Edinburgh venues and frantically arranging to apply to the Pleasance. Writing stuff for Ant and Dec's new show, Slap Bang. Waiting to hear whether we'll be working on a new Richard Blackwood sitcom, Ed Stone is Dead. All this and more. Wooo. §

Last night wasn't a great show. Twenty-four people in, including my sister and cousin, but they didn't seem to go for it in quite the same way as our first night audience. Perhaps we didn't quite go for it either. Looking back, only the first and last five or ten minutes were problematic and everyone was very complimentary and constructive afterwards, but the beginning sets your mood for the rest of the show and the response at the end is what you're left with when it's over, colouring your impression of what happened in between. An interesting contrast with our first night, but one that we probably should be careful not to over-analyse. §

Rory has gone totally mental. The 'Powered by Wooble' button is wonderful. §